Some of the most powerful tools to create happiness and diminish anxiety are right at our fingertips: we were just never taught them.
It’s like this: turn the radio to 101.5 and you might hear country. Turn it to 101.9 and you might hear Rap. If you never turn the radio dial, you may think the radio only plays country. Other radio waves might be in the air, but we need to be tuned into them to hear the correct frequency.
In this case, the frequency is your peace of mind. If we experience stress or anxiety and we never tune into other ways of thinking and living, we’ll always be stuck on the same station. When we feel stuck this way, we find ourselves having the same experiences and creating the same situations for ourselves. This contributes to and feeds our feelings of anxiety on a seemingly endless loop.
There are simple ways to break out of the stressed or panicked frequency we’re used to, and tune into a manageable, stress-free life. Here’s how:
Mindfulness – Mindfulness is the basis for thought-reformation, or the ability to re-route your thinking. When we’re mindful, we slow down. We take time to appreciate all the beauty around us. We feel grateful for the moment, in the moment – and far beyond. If we practice mindfulness from moment-to-moment, we’ll tap into the different ways to use this attentiveness when we face difficult or stressful situations. This will provide clear and present instructions – immediately – about how to tackle things that might otherwise make us panic.
Meditation – A small meditation practice involves just sitting still and closing your eyes. Focus on your breath. Take one breath in through your nose and fill your belly with air. Release the air through your mouth. Repeat. Then, picture a blank stage. Onto this stage comes the best, most loving, stress-free, healthiest version of yourself. Hold the image of that person in your mind. Maybe it matches up to who you are today – maybe you have a little work to do. Think back, in your mind, to what it took for the Best version of you to become that person. Maybe you switched your diet. Maybe you have a different job. Maybe you started exercising every day. Once you figure out what it would take for you to become that person, write it down. When you have a list of goals, try them, one by one. These are powerful ways we can take our control back and become exactly who we picture ourselves to be in our mind. When we have this control, our anxiety naturally melts away.
GABA – Many people find that GABA is the perfect remedy for their anxiety issues, because it tends to naturally slow down the way your neurons fire while regulating brain activity. Without enough GABA, your neurons may be trigger-happy: firing too often and too easily. Those with severe anxiety have been shown to have lower levels of GABA than normal.
Supplements – While Rx medication is the most common method of treating anxiety used in the Western world today, it’s not necessarily the most effective. Each pill comes with dangerous side effects, like depression, increased anxiety, allergies and even risk of overdose or death. If I told you there was a natural alternative to valium that wasn’t addictive, would you believe me? Well, there is! It’s called Valerian, a powerful and effective herb that can calm nerves, relieve tension and help you manage stress. Valerian creates a greater sense of well-being. It can be taken as a tea or tincture, and is great for relieving sore muscles as well.
Magnesium – Magnesium is a natural mineral used to relieve anxiety and calm the nerves. It regulates your nervous system to prevent stress, anxiety, fear, nervousness and restlessness. Stress has been proven to cause magnesium deficiency, and that lack of magnesium then amplifies the stressful feelings you’re already having. With less than 30% of adults consuming the recommended amount of magnesium, many scientist believe that we may be giving ourselves cultural mass-anxiety by not supplementing. You can take magnesium in supplement or powder form, adding it to your drinks and baths. This is the magnesium I recommend in powder or capsule form (here).
Have you ever wondered how to get rid of negative energy? Are you there right now, living with negative energy dragging on you? Ridding your body and home of negative and harmful energy is one of the most important things for you to do. Here’s how!
Proven methods for protective, good energy:
Juniper Smudge Stick -The best times to practice Juniper Smudging are when you are feeling energetically depleted, dull or unmotivated. Open your intuition up to new spiritual planes with a cleansing energy that is less about the hardcore purification of Sage, and more aligned with the gentle, uplifting energy you need after an intense purification. Use Juniper after Sage to lighten your space, to promote fresh pine-scented joy or light before and during meditation.
A Selenite Pyramid – The protective energy that these mini Selenite Pyramids cast is anything but small! Creating crystal grids of Selenite is an easy way to ensure that both your home, sacred space and mind have energetic clarity. Arm your desk with a Selenite pyramid for a energy shield to protect against workplace drama, or add one to your nightstand to keep negative thoughts from invading your dreams.
Energy Clearing Necklace – Made with a naturally polished selenite crystal, wearing the Energy Clearing Necklace daily energetically clears your body, protects your aura from negative energy and keeps your mind, body and spirit in balance. It carries a very high-vibration that evokes deep peace and clarity. This gorgeous pendant necklace is a form of “liquid light” that you can wear everyday to infuse your mind, body and spirit with white light
Nuummite Stone– The best way to keep that darkness isn’t to pretend we don’t have it, but rather to accept it and surround it with light. The Nuummite meaning will lend you strength and confidence so that you can see the mistakes and consequences of your dark side, as lessons that you can use to your advantage in the future. Keep your darker urges at bay through maintaining a harmony of dark and light. To help balance your yin and yang, carry a Nuummite stone in your pocket or sleep with it under your pillow.
Naica Selenite Glacier– Scientific exploration of the Naica mine in Chihuahua, Mexico revealed one of the most magnificent, hidden treasures on Earth—a magical cavern filled with white crystals the size of telephone poles. Like Superman’s Fortress of Solitude, this mine is filled with giant white crystals shooting out in every direction. The pure, high vibrational energy of this Naica Selenite is like liquid light. It has the ability to cleanse, purify and align you with your highest potential. When placed throughout the home, these Selenite crystals will turn your space into a fortress of solitude, and have you feeling super in no time!
I burn Palo Santo Wooddaily as well! It helps to clear the energy before I write or engage in creative tasks. Palo Santo Wood is a sacred wood that comes from the Palo Santo trees of South America. When it is burned, the smoke is believed to have medicinal, cleansing and therapeutic healing power. It also inspires creativity & clears all negative energy.
Placing protection stones and wearing protection jewelry promotes a healthy flow of energy throughout your body and your space, which is vital to your health and wellbeing. Crystals, plants and stones have given their metaphysical energies to protect people for aeons. From golden amulets of the ancient Egyptians to modern good luck charms, many protection magic items have been made of crystals and stones of various kinds. It’s time to see which one works for you!
I haven’t done a Loving Latelypost in a really long time. They actually used to be some of my favorite parts of this blog, since it totally delights me when I get to give you guys a real glimpse into my day-to-day life.
I love sharing things that I feel are bringing my health/fitness/beauty/life game to a whole new level 🙂
Here are the products, places and practices I’m really digging at the moment:
-.21 BRIGHTENING SERUMby C. Lavie is incredible! Seriously, I am in love! The signature ingredient—Siberian larch—brightens and evens skin tone by regulating the skin’s melatonin production and by reducing inflammation.
By stimulating collagen production, it also boosts the skin’s elasticity and suppleness. I apply it every night before bed and right in the morning when I wake up. Lately I’ve also been mixing in a little hyalauronic acid+ retinol serum.
Together, this combination puts it over the top. It brightens, tightens and has drastically reduced acne scars, wrinkles, under eye bags and fine lines – all concerns I’ve been trying to tackle (without success) for years!
Great for summer time to deal with sun-inflamed skin or redness, but seriously – if you battle any of the above, get yourself this stellar combo of skincare superheroes. You won’t regret it!
-I swear I’ve never felt more confident or more like ME before – all thanks to Genetix. I am SO excited about this summer and will never go a day without breaking out this sexy little bottle. Find out why🙂
–Matchaaaaaa! Although I can’t really tolerate caffeine in it’s traditional form (coffee), matcha has been an incredible way to incorporate a little energy boost into my diet without the crash or craziness. I just put tiny tiny little amounts into my tea, and I get the clarity without the caffeination.
Speaking of amazing skin, I am STILL obsessed with drinking butterfly blue pea tea, which I enjoy in some way, shape or form daily.
Not only does it look gorgeous (totally ‘gram-worthy), butterfly pea tea is full of antioxidants and anti-infllamtory properties has been proven to heal and brighten skin. Plus – it’s delicious – especially with some organic honey and cinnamon!
It also has pain relieving properties, which I need lately because I KILLED my legs during a workout a few days ago and boy am I in bad shape – haha!
OUTDOOR YOGA: I feel COMPLETELY different when I do yoga outside than I do when I do yoga inside. There is a definite connectedness to nature that gets stifled when you are indoors.
Since I am originally from the east coast, anytime I can exercise or do an activity outdoors, I always get excited. The weather has been all around perfect lately, so I have been spending at least 30 mins a day outdoors stretching, practicing kriya and meditating. It’s so inspiring and endlessly beautiful. I feel like there are so many places to explore here in San Diego! I never get tired of it!
If you want to explore Kriya yoga (the yoga that I practice), I highly recommend checking out this book,which got me started on my path and has been an invaluable part of my life ever since. It’s a very relaxing, chill, mindset and breath-focused practice, which is great for beginners or those looking to explore different types of yoga that are less well-known but still very effective.
Some of the benefits of blue vervain include its ability to stimulate the liver, soothe the nervous system, detoxify the body, reduce depression and stress, eliminate pain, lower inflammation, protect the immune system, and it helps with coughs and colds!
I use skullcap to reduce anxiety and soothe the nervous system. It also helps to treat diabetes, help with weight loss, prevent certain cancers, lower inflammation, balance hormones and aid sleep issues. Seriously one of my OG favorite plants!
I actually left the house the other day (I know – it’s a miracle!) to go to theMost Admired CEO Awards, held by San Diego Business Journal. It was awesome! I was nominated! It felt so great to go as a Finalist and connect with some of the most powerful people in SD. I also came home with an Outstanding Achievement Award from the California State Senate for my work in the private health sector.
I actually really love awards shows like this, since they connect some of the best and most hardworking people in one room 🙂 (They also help me to tackle my social anxiety, which is still VERY real most times.)
Our debut retreat is being held this November on the paradise island of Huahine. The island equivalent of the Garden of Eden, Huahine is an immense tropical jungle thriving with coconut plantations, vanilla orchids, banana groves, breadfruit trees and watermelon fields.
Beyond its lush landscapes and bright blooms, Huahine is also a culturally preserved sanctuary with sacred temples hidden throughout dense vegetation. Undoubtedly, this island will leave you spellbound.
I just got back last month, and i am forever changed. I can’t even begin to explain how much more calm and clear I feel. I’ve been able to work on so much more with so much less effort and time. I am able to let things go much more easily. I am focused on goals, which truly seem to revolve exclusively around helping others.This has brought me an unwavering peace to my soul and my actions that I’ve NEVER had before in all my life.
I cannot wait for you to experience this.
Huahine is exceptionally green because fewer travelers frequent her sandy shores and lush hillsides than her favored counterparts, Moorea and Bora Bora. For this reason, though, Huahine has retained the alluring essence and authenticity of early Polynesia.
The locals pride themselves on preserving what they genuinely believe is the most picturesque island in Tahiti; and those who visit often find that Huahine becomes their favorite island, returning again and again to find the same landscape still unchanged over time.
As you may be aware, meditation saved my life. That’s not an exaggeration: the practice has an entire chapter dedicated to it in my book. Chapter 2, to be exact. Because the only thing more crucial to my life than my childhood is my meditation practice.
This holiday season I wanted to give back in a real way, and I can’t think of anything better than to give you, my amazing internet fam, my very favorite (and never before heard!), brand new meditation series: The Highest Good Meditation Experience. I’ve worked hard to create a digestible and dynamo package that will totally transform you and today – it’s my gift to you!
The Highest Good Meditation Experience will help you instantly unlock techniques that will empower your life. Discover easy ways to de-stress + enjoy tips to keep you grounded, healthy and inspired. A wonderful integration of breathing exercises, mindful meditation and miraculous mantras peppered with natural acoustics and ancient singing bowls to guide you on your personal path. Allow the sounds of ocean waves to embrace you, alongside vibrations specifically chosen to aid in relaxation, brain function and mindfulness.
Just turn on your speakers or plug your headphones in and hit play.
This breakthrough four part series includes:
Empowering Your Life
Life’s Ten Questions
The Connection Meditation
The Identity Technique
This series is my gift to you. Just click here – no code needed!
This month I’ve partnered up with Buddhi Box + 4 other amazing, beautiful, goddess yogi’s to bring you the April Buddhi Box reveal.
Buddhi Box is a monthly Yoga box subscription created and curated by my good friend Maxine Chapman. Maxine is an empowered woman, a vibrant light, and a dedicated yoga teacher here in sunny San Diego. She’s determined to bring you the absolute best for your yoga practice, health and wellness journey. I shared some of my favorite parts of April’s box this month with Maxine and some of our other incredible friends at Pura Vida Yoga Studio in San Diego.
Buddhi Box was kind enough to use my song Wake Up, as the background music for the April reveal as well.
This past year has been undoubtedly the one where all the pieces and experiences in my life have finally begun to come together coherently, and it’s also been one of my hardest without my hero. Yesterday made it officially one year since my Dad passed away. The shock of his death, the anger immediately after the loss, the incredible pain of moving on every morning without him were some of my most difficult days.
I’m the one with the super-fro with my fingers in my mouth. 🙂
Then, just a few months later, another loss: my good friend Heather succumb to lyme disease after an intense, decades long battle. Not because it had finally ravaged her body, but because she decided that the best conclusion to her life was to walk in front of a train one night to end her pain.
The day I showed Heather around the Getty Museum in LA.
It cracked my heart open all over again. It drained me completely, and left me back in that bewildered fog I had just pulled myself out of. I’ve read a lot in loss literature about “What to expect” from grief, but the truth is, our experiences are all completely different. Our losses are different. Our moment to moment feelings are different. So, instead of telling you what to expect – because I can’t – or telling you what I wish someone would have told me – because I heard it all and that really never made a dent – I’d like to share with you what I’ve learned about grieving this past year. From my heart, to yours…
Take care of yourself – Putting yourself first is very important, especially in times of loss. If you haven’t figured this out by the time you lose someone you love, it can be a great time to start. Eat healthy, do some yoga, work out, get out of the house. Your loved one might be gone, but you’re still here, so make the most of it.
Get Grateful – This was one of the things I posted about when I first spoke about living my medicine a few months after Dad passed, and it’s only been more solidified for me. Appreciation will get you through just about anything. Stop to feel your departed loved ones presence with you. Smell the roses. Watch the sunsets. You won’t regret it.
Get Lively – Not Lonely – Don’t shut people out. One of the first things I did after a few days of phone-off, bed-ridden grief was to reach out to my dear friends and loved ones – many of whom I had no idea had experienced similar losses to mine! This is where I found a lot of my comfort and coping mechanisms.
There’s No Such Thing As Prepared – Did I know my Daddy was dying from cancer for 2 and a half years? Yup. Did anything prepare me for the emotional toll it took to help him in his last few months? Did anything prepare me for actually being there, watching him suffer, struggle and ultimately let go? No. Nothing could have. No matter who or what it is, nothing can ever really full prepare you for the shock to your body that comes with grief. So however you find yourself going through it, go. Go whole heartedly and with reckless abandon. Because no one could have told you about how this felt even if they tried (which they may have!)
A Distraction Is a Distraction – …. Is a distraction is a distraction. It doesn’t matter what name you call it, distracting or otherwise suppressing your grief is not helping you and certainly doesn’t help anyone around you. This tends to make us bitter and manifests itself as disease. Cry if you need to cry. Scream if you need to scream. But the sooner you face it, the sooner you can begin to heal.
When does this thing end? – I thought feeling grief was something I’d “get over”. Turns out, it doesn’t end. I’ve lost a lot of friends, in fact, so I thought I knew what to be prepared for. Uh, no. Losing a parent was an entirely different experience for me. It wasn’t long before I realized that the emptiness from losing my Dad was going to be there – FOREVER. And P.S. It’s going to get re-triggered every.single.time I lose someone else. But instead of getting panicked about it, I got grateful. I made it my mission to begin to do things not only for myself, but as a legacy to Dad. In this way, I feel I’ve accomplished more in the last year – emotionally, physically, spiritually and psychologically – than I feel I did for the 27 years he was with us. It’s given me an opportunity to grow, expand, learn and get better in a way I just never would have otherwise.
Don’t Stop Working – Pushing the pain away is, at the most, a temporary option. If you need a break, take one, but taking too much time off can lead to a depressive, loaf-tastic episode or worse, losing your job. But really, in the bigger sense, don’t stop working on yourself. Don’t let death take your life away. Keep smiling, keep laughing, and remember: the world is still spinning. I have worked more, harder and better on myself in the last year than I have ever before in my life. This is, for sure, a positive result of losing my Dad.
It’s natural – 5 Stages? I wish. Throw those notions about what grief is “supposed” to look like out the window. Grief is messy and confusing and comes and goes in waves and roller coaster rides. One of the most powerful things I learned is that grief is a completely natural response to losing a loved one. Your brain actually has to process what is notwhich is much harder to process than what is. We grieve because we loved, and the loss of love is very hard. Grief is a feeling in the process of moving onto a place of healing, but it’s not the whole process.
Comfort is everywhere – and it comes from very unexpected places. The first person who ever said something super comforting to me about my Dad was a stranger making a passing comment to me on the streets of NYC the day after the funeral. He had no idea what I was going through, but he said exactly what I needed to hear. Often times when we expect certain comfort from our friends or loved ones, we’re setting ourselves up for disappointment. This is often the time when friends and family will show their true colors, so be prepared. It’s sometimes necessary to seek out ways to grieve on your own. I’ve created meditation practices and little rituals for myself, for instance, that I do every day and especially on hard days. I also started taking (and making!) tinctures for myself specifically targeted for grief and shock, like 21 Drops Carry On blend and Dr. Bach’s Star of Bethlehem.
Focus on the big picture – Admittedly I still get peeved when people use the word ‘ grief’ haphazardly, or in relation to a breakup or the end of a friendship. I know, I know. I’m working on it. Grief is a powerful, unique, personal experience and it means something different to everyone. I’ve learned to also be careful with my own words and language. I’ve been very up on my NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming). I don’t use phrases like ‘ I hate.’ Or ‘ I can’t.’; instead I’m focused on making my words meaningful and most importantly, empowering. This keeps my thoughts empowering and keeps me moving on. Getting stuck on the little things – like ‘trigger words’, sad songs, or whatever is holding us back – can be caught and changed immediately. I’d say I’ve gone from JV to Pro at this in the last 12 months. Ain’t nobody got time for tiny pet peeves.
All in good time – It wasn’t until last week that I even touched the photo album I have with all my Dad’s photos in it. It took me about 6 weeks after the funeral to listen to all my Dad’s voicemails. I immediately recorded them to have forever, but I’ve barely heard them since. It goes in reverse, and they span over the 2 years he was sick, so Dad goes from sounding young and healthy to sick and dying as you listen, which makes it creepy and also incredibly real for me. The point is, there’s no ‘ right time’ to look back, remember, or cherish memories you had with your deceased loved one. Do it when it doesn’t hurt you. I can look at the photo album of my Dad now and smile, laugh, and tell stories and jokes. It took me almost a year, but it feels incredibly rewarding. You’ll never forget them, but you don’t have to flood yourself with tough memories to ‘ get over it’.
It’s your experience – I know I harp on having a PMA (positive mental attitude) a lot, but for me there’s no other choice because it has shown such massive results in my life to keep my head and chin up, even when I am feeling down. Even if I am “tricking” my body into feeling better, the ultimate result is more love, light and miracles in my life, so that doesn’t feel very deceptive to me. I can say that, even through the loss of my friends, or my Dad, I’ve been happy. There is a saying, “ Don’t let a bad phone call give you a bad day.” For instance, you may speak with someone who puts you in a negative mood for a moment, but that doesn’t have to put you in a bad mood for the next day or the next week! This is your experience and yours completely. Life rarely hands us things like that, so make the most of it and make it empowering for your life. Think of the good times, laugh through the bad times, forgive yourself, let yourself have some inspiring a-ha moments, and then relax. There is nothing more you could have done or said. Whether you write about your experience, give back to a cause in their name, or somehow share your experience in an empowering way, make the most of what you’re going through. What feels like the end of something if often a new beginning. When one door closes, sometimes a whole other house is built, just waiting for you to stop by and make a home.
Finally, a helpful meditation for those of you who are grieving a loss: